Endless Summer 3

So So Sorry......

Christ this takes me back........

Anyway, I don't think anyone really looks at this (it has been 2 months since anything happened on these pages, almost up to Kevins regularity :-)) so this is probably more for D and I's benefit.

Since arriving back we've immersed ourselves into the wonderful world of commuting, bills, rent agreements, over-priced consumables, babies (not ours!!!!), shopping in town of a Saturday afternoon, buying things we don't really want/need, not seeing our friends enough etc etc, you know everything we promised we wouldn't do upon arrival home. As a result our own little baby (this website) has been somewhat ignored.

We had wonderful plans of sitting out on the lawns drinking wine and reminising over our travels, at the same time producing lots of little top 10's (see the blatant plagerism Pete!!!!!) of our travels, both poingnant and witty ones. Unfortunatly this normally goes two ways. We either get too drunk and wake up in the morning not remembering a thing we discussed, or wake up not speaking to each other as a nice drunken couple arguement inevitably broke out.

But on Saturday night, we managed to be a little more constructive and had the foresight to use pen and paper to jot down our thoughts, unfortunately this didn't stop the inevitable 'disagreement'. My fault entirely, I got sidetracked by some woeful 'top 100 best boyband hits' or something else god awful on the TV. So theres a form of apology in their somewhere D. Must try harder........

We promise this will one day be finished if not for our benefit then for some stranger who accidently come to these pages..........

Oh yeah! we watched the Killing Fields last night..... we weren't really there were we???????

WILSON!!!!!

So there goes my chance of Hollywood stardom up in smoke.

Being independent, adventurous types we couldn't in anyway bring ourselves to go on an organised tour of some Thai islands, so instead we made a longtail boat drivers day and hired his services for an extortionate fee. His smile was soon wiped off his face when we announced we wanted to start at 5.30am. 'Yes' Mr driver you'll be earning your fee today.

At about 6.30am we managed to shake sleep from our eyes and actually enjoy an empty "THE BEACH" beach. Unfortunately from there our masterplan went somewhat wayward. In typical JONNAH fashion the only big swell we've seen for the last 7 months came in, making any more seaward journey today a little hazardous and probably not too enjoyable with our notoriously weak stomachs. So looking smug the driver happily drove us home, his days fee amounting to about 2 hours work!!! OK for some I suppose.

With great reluctance and heads held in shame we joined the organised tour the next day.

Living on an island a little out of the way meant 6 of us had to wait around for a bit in a small boat for the big tour ship to arrive. After about 10 minutes my 'cast-iron' stomach started to rust a little. Being about 100m off shore the obvious solution for me was to swim in and enjoy nice and stable terra firma. 10 minutes and still no tour boat. 'I'll go for a little walk I thought'. Not too far of course. With my back turned for no more than 1 minute I turned around to find..............nothing............a blank ocean. My transport had upped and gone.

Alone on a desert island...........

FANTASTIC..................

No sooner had I stripped bare, whittled up a makeshift shelter, caught tea, made fire, looked for Amanda Donahoe and bullied a fat kid in glasses then Dianne suddenly remembered I wasn't on the boat and wrestled with her conscience before eventually heading back to rescue me. Turns out that one of the fellow passengers was suffering as much as me but didn't think of getting off the boat, instead preferring to sit there until her stomach finally gave up and, to the delight of the fellow passengers, breakfast reappeared.

My dreams of having Tom Hanks portraying me in a future Blockbuster dashed before they had even began!!!!!

The next two hours sat on a tour boat with 100 excitable Japanese can only be described as pure hell!!!! Less said the better.
Our final 10 days merging in nice food, wine, tearful reminiscing, sunburn (for old times sake), swimming, blue skies, etc......

Then before you know it we're sat on a plane to Bangkok, 2 nights of buying cheap and nasty (and boy do we mean cheap) presents for friends and a final taxi ride to an airport.

7.5 months over...................... Reality starting all over again......

Right on cue

Go on then , one last sunset...

Smiley moon face

" I hate that monkey"

This really is the last

Paddles up

Captain Bob

Peaceful early morning at "The Beach"

The reality later on

...

Stress

Daily diary

Lunchtime parcels

The trip in a nutshell

Next stop Heathrow!!!

This ones for you Pete....

Shocking news - at least one of you is still looking!!!!!

Well apologies but sitting at the slowest dial-up computer in the world and looking out of the window at a hedge just isn't as inspiring as recent internet cafes.

So to get back in the right frame of mind heres the pictures as promised.

Later I may even drag myself away from Trisha, This morning, Deal or No deal (its what us dole scum do all day) and write our final 2 posts.

Friendly faces

Even monks go on holiday

Big Lips (no offence Dunc)

Walk on by

Bayon

Locals

"Vogue it girl!!!"

AAAHHH

Intricacies

Almost worth getting up at 5.30 for??

EUGHHHH!!!!!

Dianne does an Angelina Jolie

Angkor Wat

Hey Lady you wanna buy bracelet???

Escaping from Phnom Penh we were hoping for a little bit of the quiet life. First impressions indicated the opposite. As the bus pulled in the onrushing hoard of tuk-tuk drivers and taxis was actually beaten back by a kindly police officer with a big stick. hhhmmmmm. Later everything became clear as chances are the guy who takes you to your hotel (for a "cheap cheap" price) ends up being your driver for the next 3 days earning hismself a relative fortune.

Siem Reip is home to Angkor Watt, the biggest religious site on earth. Yes the temples are impressive, Yes they are huge and Yes we are sad and saw where Tomb Raider was filmed. But being philistines after 3 days one impressive big pile of rocks merged into the next. Again no words can do justice so have some pictures instead.....

Despite the grandeur of the temples the one residing memory will be the ever present row of 10 ladies, outside of each temple entrance, stood besides bright orange ice boxes singing in unison, (before the tuk-tuk had even stopped) "Hey Lady, you wanna buy cold drink" a no was always replied with "Maybe later you come back and buy from me?". Happy Days.

The kiddie bracelet and book sellers have another unique sales pitch. "Hey Mr where you from?"

"England"

"AAHH Capital city London, population 62 million, Primeminister Tony Blair. You wanna buy bracelet???"

After a few days of this we found the best thing was to simply reply "Iceland" - soon shut them up. Smartarses!!!

More apparrent in Siem Reip, obviously as a direct result of the temples, is the influx of Western money. The huge, flashy hotels have things like pools, grounds and elaborate foyers. There are even public parks (something we've missed- a great place for a afternoon nap) , new almost western looking hospitals and even tarmac on the roads.

OOOPPP's we've forgotten the CD with the pics on. But we arrive home in less than 24 hours so we'll bore you then......

PS- Ribs I finally got one of the challenges done- you owe me a beer my friend!!!!!

Heartbreaker

Bus journeys in Cambodia are an experience. Most buses are 'karaoke buses' meaning that a big TV at the front blasts out Cambodian pop songs and the adventurous can sing along if the urge hits. Cambodian pop videos basically go along the lines of a lonely felorn man walking along a beach/paddy field, dreaming of his lost love only to be reunited 3 minutes later after some horrific warbling Westerners would probably fail to recognise as singing. The particular journey to Phnon Penh was a particuar highlight owing to; the coach host bearing more than a passing resemblance to Micheal Jackson, our first time of being offered deep fried spiders and being subjected to the Crazy frog's version of Axel F several times over (Yes KT, horific visions of the sweaty Halcyon gym came flooding back).

On arrival we were both reminded of a conversation we had with a girl in Milford Sound who described Cambodia as 'the country that broke my heart'. Probably the truest thing we've been told all trip.

The past of this country has been documented so we wont go on about it. We of course visited the harrowing killing fields and Tuol Sleng, the 'Prison' used by the Kymer Rouge. Visions and feelings of visiting Auschwitz came flooding back.

What is a little more difficult to accept and comprehend is the legacy this and more recent wars has left the country. As a Westerner you are constantly approached by landmine victims with horrific injuries ranging from missing limbs and blindness and street children forever selling books. Its gut-renching and the guilt overtakes you as you wander to a restaurant when you know the money you are about to spend could go to such a better place. There are afterall only so many you can give to.

Our views of Phnon Penh??? Despite their past the people are wonderful, warm and friendly; however the city is a dirty, noisy, litter filled hole. The concept of litter bins is lost on the population, every unwanted item is thrown on the floor. The filthy stinky streets are filled with motorbikes made worse by the fact that you can't use the pavements as everyone parks their cars/bikes there. The actual drivers are liabilities, insanely rushing around meaning that everytime you try to walk somewhere you feel like your putting your life on the line.

After a couple of days it was a pleasue to leave, making you feel even more guilty as we can simply turn our backs on the poverty and suffering knowing the memory and guilt will fade over time.

Victims snapshots

Killing Fields

Bin????

Prisoners

Cells

Ring-ding-ding

I've eaten thanks

"Sh-moa mother fucker"

Beans means Heinz

Despite being landlocked by several hundred miles, D's love affair with Dolphins continues.

Having missed our proposed Valentines day dolphin trip from Don Khon (far to hung over to consider going to be honest), our first stop in Cambodia gave me a chance to redeem myself (sorry folks but no proposals still). Supposedly rare freshwater Irwaddy Dolphins are two a penny in the Mekong near the small town of Kratie. Despite the best attempts of some meanspirited taxi drivers and guard at the Dolphin spotting place to rip us off we managed to catch a early morning longtail boat out onto the tranquil waters. Just the three of us, 10-20 Dolphins and a rising sun. Unfortunately the shyness of the dolphins and the menacing brown 'water' of the Mekong prevented us from swimming here, but we've more than used up our luck doing that.

Other than the Dolpins and a fantastic little cafe where we managed to track down English baked beans and cheese on toast (heaven to our overly spiced taste buds) Kratie is a pretty unremarkable town. But at the insistence of the hotel owner we were given the Presidential suite in the best hotel in town with a balcony the size of an average house at home and delightful sunset views over the river. More importantly we had air-con and cable movies meaning that we didn't leave the room until hunger pangs grew unbearable and we had to brave the heat.

Hotel guest (Frank)

Believe it or not those blobs are actually dolphins

Camera shy

Dolphin boat

Balcony views

Leaving Laos

A fitting last few days in beautiful, unspoilt, laid backLaos. Following strong recommendations from the soon to be married Courtney & Pete five glorious nights we're spent in the 4,000 islands, specifically beautiful Sala Phae. A floating hotel ('raftel' as the ever hilarious Lonely planet calls it) pampering to the needs of stressed executives, overworked businessmen and two particularly grubby British travellers.

The journey here of course wasn't without duress. The ferry drops everyone off at Don Det the nasty, noisy, party capital of Southern Laos. Think Magaluf by a river..... Maybe that is a slight exaggeration but simply rows and rows of wooden huts filled with backpackers and "Happy Bars". (Fortunately though the world of friends bars has not made it here yet probably because there is only electricity from 6pm until10pm). Despite agreement with our beloved ferry driver before departure, on arrival to Don Det he decided to move the goalposts and thought an additional $1 was required to make the journey to our smaller island, Don Khon (where locals actually live). Despite angry words, pleas to his good nature and as a last resort out and out begging he wouldn't back down. Consultation with the Lonely Planet map revealed our resort was only about 700 metres away. With the opportunity to save 60p on the horizon and some big guns worth sticking to we decided (well I did and D with a roll of the eyes reluctantly followed) a short walk would show him.

Remember that post a few weeks ago regarding how shit the guide books were. Well I obviously didn't!!!!! That short 700 metres walk turned out to be a 'little inaccurate'. After 50 minutes of walking in the midday sun with our rucksacks on our backs, we were delighted to see our final resting place. Only minor problem being it location on the other side of a 100m wide river!!! Rather disheartenly the bridge was another 10 minutes away!!!! Diannes 'know-all' comments about it "only being 700m" were swiftly answered with "well if you didn't pack so many clothes, like I said, then you'd be alright, wouldn't you???"

Eventually home was reached. For us a budget blowing $28 a night but more than worth it.

Being situated along a small, dusty track on the banks of the Mekong away from the throng of the main resort meant that you shared your time with the locals; busy mums who did their washing in the (filthy) river; the now familiar ever smiling kids waving and shouting 'Sabadee' (hello!!) as they jumped and splashed in the water, keeping themselves entertained with games involving nothing more than a flip flop and some dirt??????; and an assortment of livestock and pets, left to wander around at will ,pigs, chickens (bird flu, what bird flu???), cockerals (natures own alarm clock, who unfortunately rather than doing a single cock-a-doodle-doo once in the morning, feel justified in reminding everyone of their presence every 10 minutes), water buffalo, dogs, cats and even monkeys.

In reminiscence of Fiji our days were filled with not alot bar drinking watermelon shakes, eating sticky rice, the difficult decision each meal time of which of the three resteraunts on the island
to eat at, refreshing dips from our balcony (ignoring all warnings about liver flukes!!!) and the occasional token bike ride around the island. The only excitement being when our raftel sunk but, unlike at home where you'd have to wait to get it repaired in a months time, the ever resourceful locals chopped a few bamboo trees down , shoved them under our room and voila we floated again.

With a heavy heart thats it for Laos. Cambodia beckons.....It has alot to live up to!!!!